I look from the window of the bus I am taking to an unknown place; people going and people coming, birds in the sky, and my tears in my eyes. The weather is too hot because we are in summer, I can hardly breathe, but although it's hot, my soul is freezing. Hardly stopping that tear from falling, I couldn't help it, I couldn't resist anymore. Many thoughts and wonders in my mind and I only had tears to describe them. Everyone looked at me at once but their cold stone black hearts seemed not to care. An old man came and sat beside me and wondered why I was crying while I have no responsibilities , and I am a still young lady. Finally someone cared about me, but I couldn't speak, like my tongue was captured by an invisible power. I had nothing but to choose silence instead of talking. The man understood and sat for a while, then got off the bus. As I am a young writer in my early twenties, i grabbed my pen and a few papers and told my story to my best friend for 22 years . I began writing my story.
My name is Sara, born in Egypt between nice people, warm weather and the famous river Nile. Nothing about my childhood was really important enough to be written down. . I went to college, I always dreamed of studying media. Everything seemed so nice and normal, I was quite happy and everyone was amazed by the purity of the soul of the child I had ; always caring, honest and active- like life is just about living. But then I had to change to survive; between the proud
, and the lies and devils wanting only my death and the death of that purity. I became a completely different person, I lied, I cheated, I changed. My friends and parents began step by step moving away from this me. Why ? I've always thought that the only way to greatness is through power, but I seem to know nothing about it, and only pretended to be someone I am not and would never be. I forget these attitudes and returned tothe old Sara everyone loved and got my life back, and that was the end. My story may seem like a film where everything breaks down suddenly, but then returns to be better than it was before, but no, that really wasn't the end. It was just the beginning.
I graduated from my college. At that point my one and only dream was to travel to America. The country of power. I did; i traveled to America just 3 month after graduation. Everyone was sad that I was going, but they appreciated my dream and they promised to write to me every week. I lived in America and it wasn't that nice; full of crime, and everyone only dreaming of money. After two weeks I had gotten a flat and a job as director and producer of a show. **That was an amazing stroke of luck, incidentally** That's where I met my best friend, Juliet. Yes, her name is as the legendary Juliet that loved Romeo and she was always proud about it. She was funny, seeking fame in many ways, she was nice to everyone and always supported me before supporting herself. She was the only angel I saw amongst these beasts that sought money and revenge above everything else. I wrote a film about conquered countries; America and Iraq, but everyone was against it, of course, because it was the reality. It was such a failure for me and to everyone involved. I received a warning about losing my job if I did not produce something more mainstream, but I kept away from such films even though I know it's true. I was writing a perfect story of a film and I wake up and find that Juliet stole it and published it under her name.. . that's how she became so famous. She took were we lived together alone and took my job and my life and everything I deserved. I lost her just that simple.
I wrote to my family thirty times in ten months, but I got only one response after being in America for five years.
I returned to Egypt. Everyone seemed not to recognize me, as though I was someone they never met. My mother had died and they were afraid to tell me; that I would return, or that something would happen to me! Many of my friends are married and have children now and I am the only person who didn’t know about it.
I forgot they’re my family and my friends, and I forgot about Egypt, but they also forget about me by writing me back only once in 10 months... like I hadn’t traveled but had died.
And here I am on that bus looking to what I had achieved by chasing a fake dream, amazed by how time can change people and how they look to you after years of being away; and how some people can act as though they love you and care about you. I’m amazed by how life can be so cruel to someone dream. I apoligize to Egypt,for I know how precious she is now after being far away from her for so long. I am sorry for leaving her to seek a dream in America that made me lose everything. I guess now if that old man was here he would know how foolish I was, because nothing is worth leaving family and friends and life, least of all the chasing of a dream that was so fake and wrong.
In the end, only reality rules, and now after I have lost everything, I have nothing to do but weep,for chasing a fake dream.
written by donia khaled hassan el maghraby
Tue Mar 23, 2010 1:53 pm by Guest
Subject: The fake dream (my first story) 
